The ultimate procrastination.  
Make believe the leaves do not
exist.  Tell yourself that they will
magically disappear under the
snows of winter, or that the
blustery winds of late fall will
miraculously remove them from
your yard.  Delusion is always a
good ploy when unappealing work
is at hand.
Getting rid of leaves is more of an art than a science.  
You can always follow tradition and rake them up,
place them in recycling bags and haul them down to
the curb.  But, you may want to be more imaginative,
and that is why mowing, composting, paying children
exorbitant wages, procrastinating, burning and
blowing are all more fun and interesting.  Good luck
with your seasonal tussle with leaves!
Ignore the Leaves
Get Rid of Leaves   
Compost and Be a Hero
If you are going to rake your leaves, you may
as well heap them into a compost pile.  
Neighbors will think you are environmentally
conscious because your leaves will turn into
naturally wonderful fertilizer by springtime.  
Actually, there is a bit more to composting than
simply placing leaves in a pile and waiting six
months, but let’s face it, the real reason you
compost is to avoid putting your leaves into
bags for the trash/recycling men.
Mowing your lawn is possibly the best way to get rid of leaves.  The mower will
shred the leaves into very fine pieces that will settle deep into the turf where
they will decay like all well behaved organic matter does.  You may want to mow
a few more times than normal at this time of the year.  The more your shred the
leaves, the easier it will be for them to decay.
Incredibly Excellent Kid Leaf Raking Video
Colorful autumn leaves awe and inspire us with their scarlet and gold beauty.  A
few leaves scattered on the lawn will give your house the "Home Beautiful" look.  But
then, the leaves have the nasty habit of continuing to fall from the trees.  And they
keep falling and falling, and then they fall some more.  When it comes time to get rid
of these leaves you realize that they aren’t so gorgeous and that they have become
quite a nuisance.  Well, here are some simple tips that will help you get rid of your
formerly beautiful, now irritating, leaves.
You Can Get Rid of Leaves
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Back breaking, hand blistering and finger racking
labor never hurt anyone, did it?  Not if you don’t
count the breaking, blistering and racking.  Invest in
a good rake if you are going to rake your leaves.  
Purchase the largest, widest rake you can find and
make sure it has metal or plastic tynes.  Bamboo
rakes look good but break quite easily.
Paying neighborhood children to rake leaves
used to be the lazy man’s dream.  Not so much
anymore.  It seems that the economics of kid
labor have gone topsy-turvy in recent years.  
Baby sitting, sidewalk shoveling, grass mowing
and leaf raking all pull in top dollar.  It seems
that it is no longer acceptable to pay children
paltry wages to do mind-numbing labor.  
However, if you do decide to go this route, set a
dollar figure for the entire job versus an hourly
rate.  Kids can become expert dawdlers.
Pay Children
The Art of Procrastination
Avoid removing leaves from your
lawn for as long as possible.  Use
rationalizations like “As soon as I
rake them, more will fall” and “It’s
too windy today.”  A good
procrastinator easily get past
Thanksgiving with time honored
excuses, and a great putter-offer
may make it to the first snow of the
season or even Christmas.
Aside from creating air pollution
and breaking the law, burning your
leaves is a incredibly pleasant thing
to do.  There is nothing that says
“Ah, autumn” like the smell and
look of a smoldering pile of lawn
detritus.  Your neighbors may cast
aspersions on your moral
character, but they will secretly
enjoy your bit of scofflaw activity.
The easiest way to get rid of your leaves is to use a
leaf blower.  Of course, no discussion of leaf blowers
can be complete without mentioning neighborly
manners.  A bad neighbor will crank up the ever-loud
blower at ungodly early morning hours and will be sure
to blow a nice bevy of leaves into adjacent yards.  
Conversely, a good neighbor will follow all the
unspoken laws of polite society and may even offer to
lend out the blower with one caveat – that the lendee
“hold on” to the equipment in their garage until next
spring.  Ah, the intricacies of suburban life!
Leaf Blowers and the Neighbors
Raking leaves is hard work.
Leaves in a compost pile.
Has Bart Simpson ever raked leaves?
Neighborhood kids raking leaves.
This article is intended to educate and entertain.  The author of this site does not accept responsibility for any damage or injury
resulting from information dispersed on this site.  Always check with experts when dealing with dangerous substances and situations.
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